Do you know?

I’ve been asked a few times:
“When did you know you had a problem?”

At the time, that question felt like a gut punch.
Because I wasn’t ready to face the truth.
The truth that I, in fact, had a problem.

So what do you do?
How do you know when too much is too much?
Is it before your world starts collapsing?
Yes… and no.

For me, I tried a test.

I bought a bottle.
Took it home.
Told myself I’d have just two drinks. That’s it.
Then I’d dump it.

I stood at the sink, wrestling with that bottle.
Telling myself,
Come on… you can do this.
Just two.
Be normal.

But I couldn’t.

And that’s when I knew.

It was a problem.

So now I ask you:
Do you know?

- L